Very excited and happy but cannot express too much because...
Hmm hope she wont feel too sad !
My dear dear phy phy..
Okay btw
Thanks God!
I thank you for didn't let me forget things that i want to say although i was so damn nervous
And thank you for letting me act confidently infront of the teacher
Thank you for letting my voice still maintain sweetly although this morning i woke up it sounded like ahgua hahahaha
Thanks God!
Let me know that this is not what i achive on my own but all these is given by You!
Need to constantly remind myself this!
Abuden i will fly too high until knock the ceiling!
Wahaha
Seeing my poor roommate suffers under stress and pressure making me feel bad for her SIA
She jing ran read till so tired then fell asleep on her book by her bed
What should i do
Should i wake her up and ask her go to her bed and sleep soundly?
Or should i just let it be?
After finishing the book i like
And then knowing tomorrow is a pontian day
So this moment now is a great time for me!
So happy!
Yet on the other hand my roommate condition is in contrast..
Nvm,I shall influence her with my positive mana!
:D
Tomorrow jiayou ah teo jia xian!
I shout it quietly silently from the bottom of my heart!
Who can tell me what was the phone i used before this lenovo?
Is it Samsung? I remember samsung was spoiled since 2013 april. But what else can i used? Macam is a keypad phone but which one is it?!
Kao my memory bag in my brain sucks!!
Argh!
Actually i want to find something important in that phone
I remembered i used to write down the feelings i had during esp
Yeah because pastor sebastian was here just now haha
And i went on remembering all those things happened last year in esp
Hmm..
He is such a great motivator
He is really good in encouraging people sia
He told me my hands are not ordinary hands! He said you are not just only playing music but the melody will touch people's heart! It's future tense ? I dont know?
Haha he got said other things as well but i was thinking like "yameh? I don't really think i can play that well sia..." lol but who knows?
XD
I just found out I always look to pastor sebastian as a prophet like that sia
Macam I am giving him to 算命?
Then i keep thinking like shi meh shi meh
But actually sometimes the focus should not be will it happened or not right?
The focus should be on the encouragement
That's really powerful words to give confidence to u!
I dont know but to me it sounds more like encouragement than prophecy
Thank you pastor sebastian!
Whether it's from God or not!
But encouragement it's something that we are always lacked of
Probably we need it?
Haha i said many goodnights just now but i was thinking about this so
Here i am!
One last goodnight! :D
Oh btw, the tragic MH17 incident.. sigh..the living are always left to bear the pain and heartbreak.
To all the families and friends out there who lost their love ones, although i may not be able to understand how difficult this time is to u, but still i pray u all can stay strong! Jiayou!! :D
I had always been complaining life in Singapore is boring! ( opps!)
yeah, why? I always think maybe there's lack of inspiring or motivating things that could surprise me!
everyone has about the same schedule, not work then study, or else mrt bus mrt bus mrt bus
buildings look about the same, there are all kinds of people but i see almost everybody behaves the same or should I say yearn for the same thing
am feeling so empty recently, no strength to get up every morning, feel like going home Pontian everyday, complaining this and that, hate classes, blah blah blah
no motivation, no surprises, no Purpose, what am I doing in Singapore?!?!
haha back to what I want to say
This morning our lecturer showed us this which I think it's very encouraging
It's been so long that I was reminded to be kind and nice to people
because here u will come to know 'this is a dog-eat-dog world' which somehow people around you will keep emphasizing on how realistic the world is
and you forgot the simple kindness the simple happiness you can do to people and yourself
This! I missed these kind of video
Ya I know this isn't that 'REALISTIC'
but it's good to be reminded again that only 'LOVE' could shape a better world today.
and the song it's so nice!! -one day
well, on the mrt just now
I tried to finish the book which I put in my shelf for so long already
by Mitch Albom, yeah the front few page was so boring and I thought of what you told me haha and I thought maybe you are right he is such a boring person! duhh
So there was it, the book was being lonely for quite sometimes
until today I think I need to finish it asap so I can return it to tanxuewern!
-Have a Little faith
I thought it was going to be like M.A. five people you met in heaven like that
erm abit creating his own scene and own story of God
haiz, sadly, it's not!
it's also not like the usual christian book who state those absolute ways that you have to follow
making you feel that you are not enough
or those books which have their own beliefs and write brainwashing stuff against christianity
it's quite an honest book, for me.
hen hao kan!
I haven't finish yet
I always thought I will be rely on God since ESP since what I had promised
but faith can always fade much easier and faster than what I thought
A sentence, A phrase or a word can easily strikes your belief
At one point you don't know who to believe who to turn to anymore
because you are so confused and so tired of Him
you dont know what are you singing in praise and worship
the world told you not to rely on Him
To be frank I am quite confused by those views of John Green's in TFIOS
it's interesting deep and confusing at the same time
for I quite agree on what he said
This is a world full of darkness, alamak what is God doing?
therefore, despite of this he said he want to bring a thing call hope in this real-struggling world
for a moment, I found a similarity that both Mitch Albom and John Green has: Bringing hope to the readers, in an honest way?
that book kind of present me a thing I need call Faith
for me it's so hard to have it
it is about a man who was graduated in the Religious school yet didn't know what he was doing
running away from the Lord
and everything related with Him
kind of related
came from a christian family
but don't know what I was doing for most of the time
doubts, questions come like a rushing river
Crushing down your faith bits by bits
His thoughts were such similar to mine ohhhhh dear
and I was reminded by this
He asked the rabbi How to be happy?
Simple ans to be thankful, to be satisfied on what you have
it's such simple thing but why do we keep on forgetting it?
哎呀 讲华语比较容易带出来 因为我要去冲凉了！要快一点
不知道什么时候 一点一滴地被影响
不再相信简单的快乐
哇 好多人都在追求那什么
去凑凑热闹跟一跟也不错！
哦？什么？
知足常乐？！
这句老掉牙的话听到不要听 看到不要看 真是的
但不知道为什么 同样的几个字
be grateful, be thankful, be satisfied.
从这书本带出来的感觉就是不一样
看到那里 眼泪竟然突然间掉下来 好丢脸！ 我在挤巴士勒！
啊 巴士上 人很多 people mountain people sea
custom人来人往
但是虽然人多杂乱
心不像以往那么烦那么乱
突然好像明白空虚的来源
很固执 又不是不知道不应该
但影响力是不容忽视的 你以为你多坚持
可是那过程可以是慢慢地 慢慢地 等到你发现已经很远很远了
对上帝
很多的怀疑 很多的不相信 很多的埋怨
也从书本看到不一样的东西
虽然我不敢这样断定这书本从此会让我完全实实在在不再疑惑
因为 有时候那么脆弱得你不知道什么时候会破
但是 它真的有很特别
看到不一样的角度
重新找到那种希望
ESP pastor sebastian给的那种感觉
可能是个人因素吧
然后 我敢说 这是一个你的回答
多少晚上我质疑你
我受不了 还甚至想过不然我就离开你
因为好累 受不了那些矛盾
可是又离不开
更累sia
很烦 一直问却没有答案
所以谢谢你一让我看到一个这样的书！
你的答案
总是来得震撼sia! Hehehe sia sia sia
讲师今天给我们看了那个video
就offer我们做这个challenge
感谢身边为你带来好的影响的人
曾经 现在 未来都行
那如果是针对今天的话
我要
谢谢陈雪文借我这本很无聊的书哈哈
谢谢作者的的那特别的八年然后还写了这本书
最重要是谢谢上帝让这本书带给我想要的想法
还有 今天有位小姐 在我搭巴士钱不够时问我：“你还需要多少？”
好感动！让我想到今天老师给我们看的video
这种感觉多久多久消失在人群中
哈 今天感觉很不一样很不一样！
回归吗？有一点这样的感觉哈哈
虽然我不敢保证什么 但是很开心学到了什么 :D
I really thank you my Lord
I have not finish the book but I can't wait to share it already
It's just okay how u want to define
the negative thoughts
Or the expectations that never come true
Or live in the opinions of others
Whether it's less than or greater than somebody u know
Or being a like-to-throw-stupid-tantrums person
Or thinking u are the one who-knows-it-all
U have your sadness, you have your unsolvable troubles
Since nobody it's perfect
I couldn't rant or complain more
And it's a waste of time feeling helpless over u
For It's not all your fault either
Maybe God's preparing a beautiful lesson to be learned
A journey to walk together
1st. You care too much on how others think of you and their opinions which might be ur imagination or it's real who knows will produce unnecessary burdens and stress on your tiny shoulder.
2nd. You do comparisons ALOT and you always think u are LESS than who u think are great. You find your pleasure when u felt u are better than one. You are busying finding assurance from people. Materialistic starts here as well i guess?
3rd. You can't find the purpose in your life and you are losing your passion in life. Lack of a motivator.
4th because of different reasons,You feel that u are unfairly treated. Life's unfair and suffering sucks.
5th You don't believe in Heavenly Father anymore and you only believe in yourself. End up losing all your energy and want to have Him back agaim but you feel like you have gone too far.
6th You believe everything He did and have big faith in Him. Still when things don't go according to your plan, you feel disappointed and hope fades. So what now?
7th You believe in yourself alot and in the end you found out that you are not that good as you thought. You feel disappointed and again.. you questioned who u are.
8ve you are tired of putting a mask yet taking it off is like wearing pure gold accessories in malaysia jb or KL. You have to take the risk of being hurt. So basically, DILEMMA.
Occasionally, u felt some kind of complicated feelings which you find yourself dont know how to express it out
It's kind of a mixture of sad and empty or lonely or dont know..?
And It has all kinds of side effects
Insomnia, depression blah blah blah
And most terrifying things it's that
You cant find that specific source which leads u to this kind of mess.
You thought No reasons? Or just afraid to seek?
just trying to sort it out.
Yeah, thoughts do ruin.
Alamak Group kita macam international group sia
Tiga dari china satu malaysia dan itulah saya!
Cikgu letak semua A punya sama sama
Dan saya sangat gimtio sia!
Kerana saya rasa saya tak cukup dapat A
Mereka mempunyai standard tinggi punya!
不知道会讨论到怎样
一直感觉他们有点...MCP
Cis!
Aku sangat nervous sia...!
Entahlah, apa yang jadi pun tak boleh ubah
Dan fikir yang positif punya ialah saya dengan mereka yang kreatif dan SANGAT SANGAT berconfident mungkin boleh mudah dapat markah baik wahahahaa
Ini yang menggembirakan!
Newton's third law
For every action there will be an opposing force acting towards it in an opposite direction
事事都有正负两面
好吧！ 久违的国语呀
Then
然后我不知道我以后上不上得了大学了
活了十八年第一次。。。真的是无脸见爹娘
Ya, it's going to let you all down..
But it Could be a motivator to work harder right?!
Ya being positive! Hmmhmmhmm!
Anw sad also sad guo le
Everything still have to be continue...
:D
So let's shout out
JIAYOU EPC EPC EPC!
Actually it's kind of interesting too sometimes
Erm..just sometimes only la
It's been SOOO LONG that i had ever slept in such an hour!
Wah it's not good but it brings back a lot of midnight memories sia!!
Opps.
And what i did just now was like a starving man hunger for food
饥渴for defense of the ancients!
Lol hen shuang ah!
Sitting in a magical seat
Feeling happy excited angry defeated disappointed satisfied at the same spot
i can feel the old me, can feel the memories!
Hahahhaah
And a lot more things which you will never really appreciate in the past
I went in my very own room today, and my own toilet!!
Damn, I don't know why I even complained to my mum that my room and toilet was TINY before...
it looks so SPACIOUS to me now!!
alright ren jia dang chu nian shao wu zhi ke yi ma~~
well!!
haha and I guess I kind of miss the special mix of milo at the beach there
and all the coconut trees which I have not see in a while
can't stop for feeling excited cause I am going with my mum later!
It's funny I even miss my Johnnie don't know why
is like 'home' is a term where every bit of these link together in my mind
I know I am not like studying in KL or very-far-countries out there
I can come back any time WAHAHA envy right? xD
but then new environment actually somehow represent new life
things are just different from what you're familiar with or what you grew up with
and now is like they can only be existing in you, somewhere deep in your heart which group themselves together as the 'old life'
new environment, new people, new life,
Nothing to rant about thou
as changes are just a part of growing up, I believe.
There's no such worldly matters that could be with you forever... like ever.
but one thing no! i DON'T want it to be changed!
that's...
ME!! :D
I want to be the same pure and cute and innocent and adorable me wahahaa! :D
no la, i mean I don't want to be changed by how environment could shape me! :(
haiya I know things can be uncertain, I don't know what I will be like after ten years striving in the reality
but that's a wish,
Nobody ever want to lose themselves right?
I don't know but it doesn't sound happy
Growing to be mature and being childlike may not necessary to be in contrast
I believe they could be on the same boat
and.. that's more than just a wish,
it's a prayer too.
You know you should not open any browser right now
You know you should focus on your book and powerpoint right now
You know although you are not going to understand the most part of it
You know you still have to face it
You know you have not much time left
You know you probably can't do well with that
You know so,you are going to disappoint your family maybe
And because of all this
You know, you are running away from that stupid EPC!
Damn! but no matter how much you want to avoid
The time HAS to come
IT HAS TO
IT HAS TO
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hahaha cuter than Malaysia chabor !! hahah opps I shan't compare this with that xD
It's not that typical type of Christian worship song but just suit my taste!
for me that's more real..
listen it as normal liuxing yin yue with good lyrics bah!!!!!!! :D
